Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Launch Party #3

Let's keep the party rolling. Please pass the word! Did you enjoy the scene from the cutting room floor? If you missed it, it's on my website--link's on the home page.

Next excerpt - another scene where Tracy helps show more about Colleen's character. We've seen that Colleen is starting to get established in her new life. Tracy's a kind of take-charge gal, and she wants to accelerate the process. But there still needs to be conflict. Much as retail therapy is fun, we have to see a little more than two women picking through the clothing racks at Nordstrom.

Colleen let Tracy lead her around the department store. She'd been to the Salem Nordstrom a couple of times, but she much preferred the L.L.Bean catalog. Before she knew it, Tracy had whisked her into a fitting room with an assortment of skirts, slacks, blouses and dresses.

"Here you go," Tracy said and held up a green jersey dress with a draping neckline. "This is perfect with your eyes and hair. And it's simple, no frills. It'll look great on you." She handed Colleen the garment and stepped away. "I’ll go sit in the 'men waiting with purses' section and you can model."

"You can stay." She unbuttoned her shirt and slipped it off. Tracy's eyes widened. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. But a sports bra isn't going to work with this dress. Do you have something a little more, um, Victoria's Secret at home?"

Colleen shook her head. "Miracle Bras don't exactly work with Kevlar vests."

"You've got some great girls under there. What size are you? I'll go get our salesperson to bring something more appropriate. "

While Tracy went off on her quest, Colleen examined the clothes hanging in the fitting room. Simple, tailored, and comfortable looking. She smiled. A new Colleen for sure.

By three o'clock, Colleen was created anew, but exhausted. "Who knew shopping was this tiring?"

"But it's a good kind of tired," Tracy said. "You want to hang at my place? We could rent a movie."

"You like James Bond? I've got three at my place."

Tracy parked her car on the street at Colleen's apartment and the two of them lugged the armloads of bags down the driveway. "Your landlady sure blasts the TV."

"She's in her seventies. A little hearing loss is probably normal."

Colleen set her packages down on the entry tiles and fished for her keys. As she went to slide the key into the lock, the door swung open. No way had she left it unlocked, much less ajar. Her pulse rate tripled. "Shit. Tracy. Get to the car. Now. No questions."

So, what did you learn about Colleen in this scene -- would you turn the page?

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J. Perry Kelly said...

Hi Terry! Yes, I would! I loved how you placed Colleen out of her depths while shopping, allowing Tracy to take the lead, but had her snap into alpha control when confronted with danger. Now I want to know...if someone broke in for whatever, how did they know she'd be gone? I have suspicions! :<) James Kelly

Terry Odell said...

James - glad you liked the excerpt-and sorry, but you'll have to read the book to see if you're right. :-)

Lanae T. said...

I'm totally hooked at this excerpt! Yes, I would turn that page! In fact, can we turn it now???

That's it! I have to find this book! ;)

Maryannwrites said...

Very engaging excerpt. Yes, I would definitely turn the page.

Linda Leszczuk said...

Yup, I was seriously annoyed when I realized I was at the end, so I'm hooked.

One thing that surprised me, based on what I've read on Colleen so far, I had her pegged as a simple, tailored, comfortable clothes woman, but you said this is a new look. What was her old look? Certainly not frills and fancy.

Andrea I said...

I would definitely turn the page. Colleen had a much different look before Tracy took her shopping.

Natasha said...

Sports bra with a green jersey dress- Colleen sure sounds like me!

Stalker ex-boyfriend? Deranged relative? Has it happened to her before?

The story sure is a page turner. Hope it is available in India, because I NEED to know more.