He Fights, She Fights - Part 3

What I'm reading: Hot Mahogany by Stuart Woods

What I'm writing: Chapter 32

To wrap up the fighting workshop, we'll look at women fighting women. Compare these points to the ones in yesterday's post about men fighting men.

In a cat fight, anything goes.
Fights tend to be short and violent.
They don't stop when one participant is subdued.
Women never forget the outcome or the reason for the fight. (You remember that time in third grade when you scribbled on my homework?)
Women don't want their appearance diminished.
Women will go for what is most precious to her opponent. (Ruin expensive clothing, pull hair, etc.)
Women are embarrassed about fighting and seldom brag.
Women slap rather than punch, to avoid injury to hands.
A woman trained in fighting will be more violent and hold a grudge longer than a non-trained woman.
Women will sacrifice just about everything to protect their children and loved ones.

Advice to women (regardless of the gender of the opponent)

Make noise. Lots of noise. Attackers don't want to be noticed.
If you can get away, don't stop to look back. Get somewhere safe first.

In writing, remember that for characters in fights, all scenes have consequences, both physical and emotional.

Deb Maynard also suggested that unless you know a lot about the specifics of the various martial arts, it's wiser not to mention them by name. You might have your character performing moves that are totally out of place for that method. She divided the martial arts into two basic styles: Wrestling and Boxing.

Wrestling includes: Judo, jujitsu, Aikido and Hapkido.

Boxing includes: Karate, Kung Fu, Kenpo, Tae Kwon Do (which she pointed out is more martial sport).

He Fights / She Fights - Part 2

What I'm reading: Playing Dead, by Allison Brennan

What I'm writing: Chapter 32.

To continue with my notes from Deb Maynard's workshop at the Emerald City Writer's Conference:

Men fighting women. (Women, these are things to be aware of)

1. Grabbing clothing or purse straps.

2. Grabbing long hair (wonder if hubby will accept that I'm safer with short hair!)

3. Grabbing from behind, around the neck.

4. Lapel grabs.

5. Pushing a women against a wall.

6. Ambush.

7. In bed asleep.

The way men fight other men. Again, as I said yesterday, these are all generalizations. We all know exceptions, but these are the basics for men who fight.

Men will fight for just about any reason.

Men fight until one gives in

Men enjoy the fight. Often it's, "Great fight, now let's grab a beer."

Men brag about fighting.

Men are more physical, they will take more damage without worrying about injury or appearance. In fact, bruises are often badges of honor. And again, it's likely to be, "Great fight, now let's grab a beer."

Men fight and then let go of the reason for the fight. When it's over, it's over.

Men anticipate a fight and are more aware of surroundings and possible outcomes.

Men see fighting as part of their nature.

Men are proud to defend and protect (goes back to that hard wiring and the his brain/her brain)

A man's ego is engaged in the fight as much as his body.

Men see fighting in terms of a winner and a loser.

Tune in tomorrow for the last installment.

He fights / She fights

What I'm reading: Just Breathe, by Susan Wiggs

What I'm writing: Chapter 31. My aviation scenes are mended, thanks to a very nice airline pilot who took a lot of time making sure I understood how things worked--and didn't work.

Today, I'll start sharing some workshop notes from the Emerald City Writer's Conference.

Martial Arts expert Deb Maynard presented a workshop on fighting—the physical kind. The notes I'm sharing, as always, are filtered through my interpretation and sometimes shaky memory or illegible handwriting. For this workshop, we also had the added excitement of a fire alarm going off about 1/3 of the way through.

The points here are based on her research, and are also generalizations. I'm sure everyone can think of exceptions, but for the most part, the following are the differences in the ways men and women approach fighting. And, if you've read my his brain/her brain posts, a lot of it is grounded in our basic hard wiring that goes back to men as hunters and women as nurturers.

Basic differences between male and female fighting instincts:

Men fight to feel power.

Men will aim for the face and head; women aim for a man's groin and face. (Note: men are always alert to groin attacks, so go for the throat.)

Women slap, pinch and bite. Men rarely punch women; they don't feel it's necessary to use that kind of force—they're more likely to backhand her.

Men want control. Women want to get away.

Men chase. Women run (and too often stop to look back to see if the man is still chasing her)

Men want to demean. Women want to get away.

Men don't care if they hurt someone. Women don't want to hurt.

(Interesting side note here. The other day our local paper ran an article about the upsurge of women using Tasers—the article called Taser demonstrations the "new Tupperware party." While a cop's taser fires for 5 seconds, which is considered enough to subdue the suspect, the civilian model delivers a shock for 30 seconds, which is designed to let the woman escape. While testing these models and watching the electrical display on the target, a woman said she really didn't want to have to use it because she didn't want to hurt anyone. But she supposed she would if her life was in danger.)

Men will kill in a fight. Women try to avoid killing.

Men will attack without thought of defense. Women defend themselves first, then attack.

Over the next day or so, I'll post more about differences between the way men fight other men, men fight women, and women fight other women.